We talk about important life issues. In today’s show we talk about people that have expensive cars that feel they need a huge sticker to let you know what it is, how toilet protectors affect our lives, why milk hormones only benefit women, what happen to the receptionist that killed herself over putting a prank call through to Princess Kate, the difference between face soap and body soap, and why women don’t like balls.
My friend Steve gave me some great jokes for you guys.
Q: what are the main ingredients in Viagra
A: fix a flat and miracle grow
Q: what do you get when you mix viagra and rogaine
A: Don King
Q: what do a dildo and tofu have in common
A: they are both meat substitutes
Why females should avoid a girls night out after they are married….
If this does not make you laugh out loud you have lost your sense of humor.
The other night I was invited out for a night with the”girls”.
I told my husband that I would be home by midnight,”I promise!”
Well the hours passed and the margaritas went down way to easily.
Around 3:00 a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home. Just as I got in the door , the cuckoo clock in the hallway started and cuckooed 3 times.
Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9 times. I really was proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him.
(Even when totally smashed… 3 cuckoos plus 9 totals = 12 cuckooes Midnight.)
The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, I told him Midnight…He didn’t seem pissed off in the least.
Whew , I got away with that one! Then he said “We need a new cuckoo clock.”
When I asked him Why, he said, Well last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said “Oh shit”, cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat ,cuckooed another three times , giggled, cuckooed twice more and then tripped over the coffee table and farted.
Lastest podcast about my cruise as well as some other life comedy
The podcast is now available.We are still waiting to be listed on iTunes however the podcast is available for you. Click below to subscribe via rss or iTunes. There is also a page listed above and an episode list to the right.
My friend got me to start listening to “The Adam Carolla Show” podcast. Finally, someone who I have a lot in common with. This guy says everything that I think. The show is hilarious. You guys will love the show. He calls it like it is. Check out the podcast. Oh if you are a tight ass and you daily radio is Rush Limbaugh you will hate Adam. Chances are if you read my blog you will like it.
I am working on starting my own podcast because I think it is much easier for me to express myself that way. It’s hard to emphasize and show emotion blogging in text. I am hoping to have the first one up in the next few days. I will keep you informed.
Walking out of the crew lounge today there was a frequent flier leaving the lounge waiting directly in front of the elevator. As the doors opened there were about 10 people inside. I moved aside to let them exit. The bitch next to me refused to move. She stood right in front of the doors and made people walk around her. Listen up. Just because you think that you are all that doesn’t mean all others should bow down to you. Get out of the way. I think you should be able to just run these people over. How funny would it be if one of the flight attendants on the elevator just walked right through her and laid her out and turned around and then said to her “here are your peanuts bitch.” That would have been priceless!
First there was the Snuggie. Now here is something even better. At first I didn’t even think this was real.